Preschool Years - A Critical Period for Foundational Development

Recognize the difference in your children.

Growth is not static or follows open progression. It can be three steps forward and two steps backwards before another forward leap. A child that is allowed to develop at his own speed usually wins the race of life. Recognize the difference in your children. Each child is an individual and has individual talents and abilities.

As I mentioned, children develop at different speeds. As a parent, be aware of your child's language development, emotional and social development, and gross and fine motor skill development. Information about your child's development enhances your capacity to respond appropriately to him.

As an informed parent you'll be better equipped to problem solve, be more confident in your decisions, and be more likely to respond sensitively your child's developmental needs.

Work Closely with Your Child's Teachers
If your child is in a preschool program, work with the teachers in encouraging your child's development. At this stage, you do not have to get your child to learn, only to allow and encourage him in learning. You do not have to dictate what they should learn; only to observe and respond to what it is he is learning. Such responsiveness is the most educational and the most loving.

If you think of learning as a path, you can picture yourself walking besides him rather than pushing or dragging or carrying him along. The wisest thing that you can do is to let your preschooler figure out the details on how to draw the human figure, and solve a range of problems from overcoming Saturday boredom to dealing with a difficult kid in the neighborhood. But even if you are standing on the sidelines, you can frequently offer support in helping your child discover what he wants to accomplish.

Read to Your Children
And, finally despite the current rave about computer games and acquiring academic skills via the desktop or laptop, reading out loud is one of the most valuable gifts you can give to your preschooler. You are providing several things:
1. Pleasure. You are presenting books as a means for enjoyment. An addiction to books and reading is one of the most valuable gifts adults can give to children.
2. Vocabulary Development. Preschoolers enjoy new words. Through stories, they hear new words in a meaningful context and absorb the meanings.
3. Listening Skills. Starting with simple picture books and getting more complex as the year progresses, children develop the skills to follow the simple lines of a story. Their attention span increases with experience.
4. Stretching Imagination. Books take children out of their immediate environment and into the realm of their imagination.
5. Talk Written Down. As children see the teacher run her finger across her words as she reads, they slowly get the idea that those little black squiggles represent sounds and words... a basic pre-reading awareness that is necessary.



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11 Time Management Tips for the Busy Single Parent

A wise man once said that counting time is not so important as making time count. Good time management and making time count is a must for busy single parents. While there are many books and articles on time management, here are 11 time management tips, boiled down, that I believe you will find useful:

1. If you feel that you don't have time to complete things, break the job into smaller units. No time to read a book, set aside 15 minutes a day to read a few pages or a chapter, or better yet, try a short story.

2. Once you determine exactly what is most important to accomplish any given day, do not allow yourself to be interrupted until it is done. Don't take calls, don't take a coffee break, and don't put in that load of wash. Do what you have to do, and then get on to other things.

3. Making lists is a crucial way to organize your life and keep things simple. But always make a list you know you can accomplish. At the end of the day you will feel good about what you've done rather than overwhelmed by which you haven't done. Failure can be exhausting.

4. Keep a list of short calls you need to make (such as calls to arrange appointments) and make them early in the day. You can cross off several "to do" items from the list - and start your day off right.

5. Every now and then you will think of someone you haven't spoken to in a long time and have an impulse to call. However, if it's too late, write those names down and you'll be more likely to get to them.

6. Don't over schedule your children. Children (and adults for that matter), need downtime to do absolutely nothing. This kind of downtime is every bit as important as piano lessons, Little League, and gymnastics. Maybe even more so.

7. Telephone calls are something we all could do a lot less of - - so set certain times of the day when you simply don't answer the phone. Use that time to cook dinner in a peaceful, mindful way, or just hang out with your family.

8. Think about the people you spent time with on the phone or in person. How many of those relationships seem fulfilling? How many feel like habits? Think about time as a valuable commodity, and don't waste it in company that isn't pleasing.

9. Consider not making social plans for more than two weekends in a row. It's important to give yourself time every now and then on the weekend to have no plans. If you feel like pulling something together at the last minute, you can always do it

10. Whenever possible, take your children along on errands instead of arranging childcare. It is educational for them, and it can make a dull task interesting. Of course some errands are fun with children in tow, but others are nearly impossible.

11. Set your alarm clock for a half hour early every morning, and think of that time as all yours. Lie in the bed, listen to the radio, meditate, exercise, soak in the tub, or do whatever you need to do to prepare yourself for the day ahead.


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3 More Things You Can Do to Improve Your Children's Grades

In a previous post I emphasized the importance of being firm, yet encouraging, communicating effectively, and letting the children play as an important parenting style in helping your children to improve their grades. 

Now, here are 3 more things you can do:

1. Praise your children. Low-key support, such as praise and encouragement, works better than material rewards or big, exaggerated emotional responses. Creating rewards and punishments is not effective because children become more concerned with them than with their schoolwork.

Try to help them understand that though they may not always enjoy what they're doing, it's important that they persevere. There is an exception, however, to low-key support.

When a child's grades are very poor, stronger intervention is necessary. The school and parents should work together to find out what is causing the low grades and take steps to correct the problem. You must keep in constant contact with the school to demonstrate your concern. Don't wait for them to contact you if you sense a problem.

2. Don't overreact. If your children bring home poor report cards, don't get visibly upset because this will only worsen the situation. Your distress will upset your children more and this will lead to poorer grades over time. Follow the guidelines listed here and in the previous post.


3. Don't be too responsible. When all is said and done, you can't control everything that happens to your children. There are many factors beyond your reach that may influence school performance. Your children's friends, teachers, and neighborhood all have an impact. Don't take too much responsibility for what goes wrong. You have a responsibility to try to help your children do the best they can in school, but you are not responsible for the results.


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The 3 Things Every Woman Should Know About Social Security and What to Do About It

Ida May Fuller, the first recipient (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 
Now with your Social Security taxes going up by 2%, it's important for you to understand that you don't own your Social Security plan, the politicians do. That's why Obama was able to manipulate it. Not only that, the Social Security system is already paying out more than it is taking in. By any and all acceptable financial standards, it is already bankrupt.

Moreover, it ought to be unacceptable to you that federal, state, and local government workers have a far better retirement plan that you have under the Social Security system. Learn the difference between a defined benefit retirement plan and a  defined contribution plan. More on this in a later post.

Now, Social Security is sometimes mistakenly referred to as retirement insurance. Nothing could be further from the truth.

When you begin to recognize that it isn't retirement insurance, and is in fact a Ponzi scheme and one that Bernie Madoff would love, you can demand that your politicians change the laws whereby you can have a choice of either participating in the Social Security system or having a personal retirement plan that you actually own. 

For women, especially, Social Security is a bad deal. Here are three reasons.

1. Suppose you have been married at least nine years and 11 months, been supportive to your husband through good times and bad times, but the relationship deteriorates and you get a divorce. Since you were married to him for less than ten years, you would not be eligible for survivor's benefits when he passes away.

2. Suppose you had a long and satisfactory marriage and you both retire and begin receiving Social Security benefits, when he passes away you are faced with a dilemma. You can receive either your benefits or his, but not both. Your government has just confiscated your benefits you have worked a lifetime for with without you being given recourse - a totally unacceptable situation.

3. And, suppose you have been single woman all your life, retire and then begin receiving Social Security benefits. If you have been working in a non-professional job, you will have benefits that would be less than the national average. However if your counterpart is a stay-at-home wife married to a professional husband, she will receive 50% of his benefits while he receives 100%. Moreover, when he passes away, she will receive his 100% while never having worked. It is without question that she will have higher benefits than you will as a single woman who worked all your life.

It is clear that the Social Security system discriminates against women as it allocates a significant percentage of women to a poverty existence. This policy need to be addressed both on the political and on a personal level. I stated earlier what you should do on the political level. However, on a personal level, you need to choose the most secure and reliable investment for your funds after your employer has deducted Social Security payments from your paycheck.

I suggest strongly that you consider life insurance with a cash value buildup. This can be a whole life plan or a universal life plan. The key points are that the cash value is guaranteed and builds up tax free. That means that the politicians can’t get their hands on it. You should buy as large a face amount that you afford so that your beneficiaries can receive a tax-free estate if you pass away before retirement. Investing in the stock market or in an annuity are other options, but with either of these options, you have a tax exposure and comparatively little or no remaining estate.