For Personal Development and Productivity - Start by Managing Your Time

Procrastinations, interruptions, and distractions are the three culprits that work against your efforts at personal development and productivity.

1. Procrastinations often arise because psychologically you don't want to do the task and consequently you keep putting it off. 

You either perceive the task as being too difficult, too aggravating, too provoking or all three and try to avoid doing it. 

However, avoidance is not the solution and the longer you put it off, the more anxious you will become. 

The solution is psychological in nature. You need to relax, visualize the most positive and constructive outcome you can, and then focus on the steps necessary to make the outcome a reality. Take the steps and then be pleasantly surprised at what happens.

2. Interruptions can be phone calls, someone wanting a face-to-face meeting with you, or any unanticipated event. 

Interruptions, however, can be prevented. If you're working at home consider structuring your day and vow to stick to your structure. 

Break your day down into time/task segments. For example, if according to your body clock, you are typically alert and do your best mentally challenging work early in the morning, schedule the first hour of the morning to do your research and writing if you work requires that. 

Then, schedule your organizing and filing at the end of the day. The hours in the late mornings and mid afternoons can be allocated for meetings, phone calls, appointments and lunch breaks.

3. Distractions are the result of an undisciplined mind. 

Distractions principally happen as a matter of choice. You can choose to be distracted by watching porn as some of our government workers were recently seen doing. You can choose to dwell on the argument you had with your spouse. Or, you can choose to be distracted by the computer games instead of focusing on your tasks.

While procrastinations are also a matter of choice, distractions are even more so. Procrastinations might indeed be associated with having to deal with an unsavory experience such as have to fire someone, reveal some other type of bad news to someone, or just doing something you just don't want to do but has to be done. 

Distractions on the other hand tend to result from an idle mind - a mind without a focus. Choosing to focus and act on constructive tasks with a strong desire to do so until you complete them eliminates distractions.

Your personal development as well as your productivity depends upon you clearly identifying these three culprits and taking the steps to eliminate them.

How have you been managing or eliminating these three culprits? Leave your comments below.

9 Superb Ways to Effectively Discipline your Child

Only the term discipline will be used here, I do not believe that punishment should ever be used in any attempt to manage children's behavior. 

The goal of all disciplinary strategies is to encourages positive behavior. 

Punishment breeds resentment and when the child gets older-- rebellion or even running away may happen. 

Consider these 9 Ways to Discipline Effectively:

1. Give children love. All children need to know they are loved. Younger children especially need the reassurance of hugs, kisses, smiles, and praise. Immediate praise encourages children to repeat positive behavior. 

2. Listen to your children. Adults like attention when they speak, so do children. Listen carefully do (not absentmindedly) to your child. Your child may be flattered by your interest and even try harder to please you. Busy parents need to set aside a special listening time each day for the children (for example while doing the dishes or before bedtime.)

3. Understand your child. Needs and wants change as children grow older. For example young children need to know parents are near. Most teenagers need some privacy as well as regular outings with friends. Listening and  observing carefully will help you deal with these changes.

4. Set limits. Realistic limits are necessary for safety and for the family’s’ happiness. Setting limits involves: Explanation-- Sharing with children the reason for the proposed limits. Discussion-- coming to an agreement on the need for the limits, and ensure that the limits are understood. Repetition – reminding children about limits until self-discipline developed.

Children may test you to see if you’re serious. At other times, they may forget what they are supposed to do. All youngsters need limits on: time (bedtime, curfews); boundaries (you may not know go here and not there); and, behavior (you may do this and not that). Enforce limits firmly and fairly 

5. Give rewards. To help establish what is desired, give praise properly every time your child responds appropriately. Younger children love smiles, hugs, kisses, and thank you’s. Older children respond to praise, special privileges, etc. (use material rewards sparingly.)

6. Promote independence. When children understand and agree to limits, they are learning to set their own. To promote independence allow your child to share in decisions. As he or she grows older, give increased responsibility for setting limits. Provide encouragement and comfort whenever your child experiences failure.

7. Discuss emotions. Let your child know you understand that he or she is angry and frustrated and that it's okay to feel that way. Let your child know your feelings, too. Eventually your child will learn to talk about feelings – instead of misbehaving.

8. Promote responsibility. Give children jobs to do at home. Even very young children can put away their toys and clothes. To encourage responsibility, discuss what needs to be done; assign jobs to each child (rotate chores for fairness); set time limits for completing jobs; and, check to make sure jobs are done. Praise children for completing tasks to help them develop their confidence.

9. Set a good example. Children learn from watching others. If you want them to be on time, you should be also. If you want them to pick up their clothes, you should pick up your own. If you want them to speak softly, so should you. If you want them to be polite, you should use "please", "thank you", etc., when talking with your children and others. You want them to stick to limits, you should set your own limits and stick to them.

            Do you accept the distinction between discipline and                punishment?  Leave your comments below. 

How Children Learn Social Skills

Children are much more comfortable when they know the guide rules for handling the social amenities. 

It is no more fun for a child to be introduced to a strange adult and have no idea what to say or do than it is for a grownup to go to a formal dinner and have no idea what fork to use.


What are Social Skills
As children grow older, they acquire a growing repertoire of social skills -- strategies used to interact effectively with others. Yet children vary considerably in their social competence. 

Some are courteous, some know how to initiate and sustain conversation, and regularly cooperate and share with peers, others are less skilled; they may be anxious and uncertain in social situations and keep to themselves, or they may shout, call names, use physical aggression, and in other ways alienate their age mates. 

Throughout their development, young people’s social skills affect the number and quality of their friendships.

Ways Children Acquire Social Skills
Children acquire social skills, equally as much from their interactions with their peers as from adults. 

They are likely to discover through trial and error, which strategies work and which do not, and later to reflect consciously on what they have learned. 

When children can’t resolve conflicts directly, the situation may quickly deteriorate. An example would be when preschoolers engage in fantasy play they must continuously communicate, negotiate, and compromise regarding the course of events – whose going to play the mother, who’s going to play the father, who’s going to play the child, etc.

Children also learn social skills by observing and experiencing the behavior of those around them. For instance, you may be intentionally or unintentionally model specific interpersonal styles – – upbeat, agreeable, and respectful of others rights and needs, or on the contrary, hostile and aggressive. So be aware.

Role of the Family
In addition to the acquisition of social skills, the knowledge of specific subject areas and acquisition of status for acceptable behavior are also responsive to family  influences. 

Families should provide a rich, physical, social, and intellectual environment in which children can explore physical phenomena, exchange ideas, and encountered challenging concepts.

What do you think. Leave your comments below.