11 Qualities for Helping Your Child Become Successful

Single parenting continues to be a challenge and even more so in this era. 

You want the best for your child. 

You want to both equip your child to deal with the temptations and distractions that is so prevalent as well as to make good choices. 

The late, great Earl Nightingale once defined success as the progressive realization of a worthy goal. 

If your goal for your child is for him to have admirable personal qualities and beyond just the attainment of wealth, fame, or prosperity, then these eleven qualities are what you want your child to acquire:

 1. To be a one who forms meaningful relationships with others            
 2. To be empathetic and compassionate
 3. To be respectful
 4. To be smart
 5. To be healthy
 6. To make wise choices
 7. to think and act morally
 8. To have confidence
 9. To have a healthy attitude towards sexuality.
10. To communicate well, and 
11. To have a pleasant attitude.

You want these success tools to become part of your child’s inner self – – a way of thinking, a way of acting; something the child is, and not something the child does.

Children take different roads to attain these goals. 

For some, the way is smooth and straight; for others it is bumpy and winding. In fact, the children whose way lies along the most difficult roads are often the ones who best learn how to use these tools for success.

Your thoughts. Leave your comments below.

12 Most Effective Ways for Handling Stress

We all experience it at one time or another; this condition is called stress.  It is perhaps the number one cause of most health problems today including ulcers, coronary heart disease, cancer, high blood pressure, lung problems, accidental injuries, cirrhosis of the liver, and suicide. 

Anti-anxiety drugs and ulcer medications are among the best selling prescription drugs in the United States.

Nevertheless, stress is the process of living. The process of living is the process of having stress imposed on you and reacting to it without allowing it to cause any of the above health problems. 

Now let’s explore the 12 steps for managing stress in your life in a healthy and effective manner.

1. Talk about the problems you are experiencing with friends, loved ones, or a professional. Keeping everything bottled up will only create more problems later on.

2. Exercise. Exercise relieves tension and produces a calming effect.

3. Take a bath. A warm bath can be very relaxing and soothing.

4. Music can be calming. Listen to some soft jazz or instrumental music. Ocean or nature sounds also are a good way to release stress.

5. Healthy meals  can limit your stress.  Try to eat three meals a day (no heavy meals), and although there are health benefits in drinking coffee, keep it to no more than three or four cups a day. 

6. Sleep deprivation can cause stress. Six to seven hours sleep can often make all the difference.

7. Coping with stress can be challenging.  Every day you seem to be pulled in every direction, trying to accommodate others.  So, take care of yourself. You are the thread which holds your family together. If you are stressed, you won’t be much good to anyone.

8. Give yourself a break every now and then.  Buy a new outfit; go to a movie; do something you’ve always wanted to do.  Ask someone dependable to take care of your children for a few hours. Alone time is just as important to you as it is for everyone else. Think of yourself as a gas tank; eventually you will run out of fuel.

9. Laughter is a wonderful release. Releasing tension through laughter is one the best cure-all method for dealing with stress-related issues.

10. Avoid stressful situations whenever possible.  If you are a working single parent, it’s probably not the job but the people who are causing you the most stress. Take everything in stride.

11. If you can’t finish a task, don’t worry about it.  If dinner doesn't turn out as you expected, improvise or pick up something.

12. Life is too short; and stress can reduce it further. Nothing is more important than your health or state of mind. 

How well are you handling stress? Do you think these steps can be helpful? Leave your comments below.  

Why Discipline Works and Punishment Don't

Equal Doses of Love and Discipline

The terms punishment and discipline are often used interchangeably.  However, there are significant distinctions that need to be made.

The importance of understanding and implementing these distinctions when it comes to raising your children is as important as knowing the difference between a thunderstorm with lightning and a gentle rain following a humid summer afternoon.

Punishment implies that you are imposing your will upon the other person.  This type of imposition can range from harsh physical whippings to verbal put-downs and denigrations.

The result is that the child doesn't learn new behaviors, but how to do hide the unacceptable behaviors so as to avoid the reaction from the parent. 

When my brother and I were kids we learned how behave in certain ways when we were in the presence of our grandmother who believed in physical punishment. 

But when we were where she could not see us, we behaved as typically mischievous kids who wanted to do what we wanted to do.

Discipline, on the other hand, implies that you are teaching the child how to behave in a acceptable manner given whatever the situation is.  

It is teaching a child by example; by withholding privileges and explaining why and how to regain the privileges; and, by praising and encouraging the child's efforts.  

When you punish your child you engender fear and resentment.  And, when the child is old enough you will get resistance and rebellion, or even worse, a runaway.  

What you are not likely to get is a child who has learned how to behave appropriately in social situations and able to make the right choices when the need is presented.

A disciplined child is one who is likely to make the right choices when temptation occurs; one who has learned how to handle different situations without much uncertainty, and, one who can prioritize his actions.

Take time to discipline your child and stop using punishment.  Punishing a child may make you feel powerful, but it is not beneficial to your child.  

Discipline your child properly and you'll have a child that you'll be proud of and one who will grow up into a strong, self-reliant adult.

That's what you want isn't it?

Leave your comments below.